Independance Day

Upon this Independence Day I find myself ever so grateful that I am an Army Wife. I love my "job". I love supporting my soldier- and every other soldier and their family out there. I love every moment- even those of frustration and fear.
There is a preciousness in being the one a deployed soldiers wife calls in the middle of the night because she cannot sleep without him and the fear in the dark has become all too real.
There is a sweetness in watching my children put on their papa's uniform and clomp around in his combat boots trying to salute, then watching them fall backwards and lie there like an overturned turtle with arms and legs flailing when their papas rucksack overcame their sense of balance.
There is a moment of envy when I see that they truly can fit in his duffel bag- and it wont matter because he cannot take them along.
There is a moment of sadness and fear and pride that is worth more than diamonds when I hear a patriotic song like Proud to be an American by Lee Greenwood or when I watch a video for songs like Letters from War by Mark Schultz. I dread the idea of learning a new APO address knowing it means that someone I love is probably not going to Germany- but instead to Afghanistan or Iraq.
There is even something special in that moment of sadness and discomfort that I do not have an answer when asked where "home" is only to say "I don't have one, I am an Army Brat and Bride".
I love the bittersweet confusion of spending holidays with my "new" family- the other Army families who are far from home too- instead of my blood kin and then the flip side of finally getting enough leave to go home and wishing instead I were with my Army Family.
There is something unspeakably exhausting of having a Holiday card list that is over 300 names long because the only way I will ever be able to keep up with parents friends (affectionately called aunt or uncle), family, school chums and friends from each place I have lived is to at least write them once a year. Who knows...we may want to bunk at their place on leave time knowing that while it saves us hotel fare, it also allows us precious time with ones we call dear.
So on this Independence Day I find myself full of thoughts and feelings-some good, some not so much... but all worth it when I think of the tradition we carry on and what we are doing it for. You. God Bless you on this Independence Day.