Dear Editor, Principal, Coach and Reader, May 21, 2009
Today a tragedy occurred at the track meet in Ossining. This tragedy will not make the evening news in fact it will be lucky to make the editors column and all the more is the pity. Today a young man thought he was unseen. We look at all that is happening in society noticing events like the 10 year mark of Columbine and wonder how kids get to that point. I can tell you how: they believe they are unseen.
This young man ran one of the longer races at the meet. He fell behind fairly quickly and stayed behind, far behind. Did he stop? No. Did he slow down? No. He kept running- he worked until he finished. When he crossed that finish line, his coach stopped his watch and walked away. This child cooled down, waiting for his timer to come up to him and write his time on his card… and no one came. He walked around some, looking at coaches and adults- anyone who might have noticed that he FINISHED the race. No one came. No one saw. Tears began to roll down his cheeks, this young man on the verge of adult, trying not to cry, struggled, choking back the tears and kept looking and searching faces. Only when I came running to him did someone start asking and paying attention. He was ready to walk off the field, believing that he was so far behind no one had bothered to stay and see him finish, that his time mattered so little that he was forgotten. Forgotten.
Yes, he was timed and yes, at least 2 of us watched him finish, but he was heart-broken. He busted hump, kept on going, and kept on trying in front of a lot of people. He could have stopped. He could have given up. He didn’t. His parents raised a finisher. Someone should have cheered him for crossing that finish line. He should have been patted on the back for holding his head up in moments of adversity. He should have been celebrated for holding to an age old belief that it is not where you finish, but the fact that you do finish. But no one celebrated him and no one cheered him.
His courage to walk up to his coach and ask, “did you get my time coach?” is on the level of David and Goliath. In all of this, he overcame fear and asked for his time, knowing there was a chance that there was none. He kept going and he did not stop- no matter what. I don’t think I would have had that courage at that point.
After leaving his coach I caught up with him and he turned to me, silent tears still streamed down his cheeks. I will never forget that face. The cheeks of a child wet with sweat from effort and tears of unspoken sadness. The eyes of an innocent who felt the sting of being invisible- I believe for the first time. I do not know his name but he is a hero in my book today. What I said to him is not important and I am not saying I am a perfect mother; I fail to notice my own children at times. However, we need to start taking the time to notice the ones who work ten times as hard as the winners to even finish. We need to celebrate the everyday person who still puts in the effort and finishes- mostly unnoticed. Please, notice someone today and if you read this and you know this is your son, hug him. Then tell him that blonde lady who spoke to him will never forget that he kept going, that I saw him finish, that he is not invisible, and that he is a hero to me.
Julie Kelly
Proud mom of 4 Croton-Harmon students
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
when is it too much? (tiger mom rant)
Question of the millenia....
When do we as mom's cross the line into neurosis over our children and their health?
When am I going too far by starting to push people to DO SOMETHING for God's sake and my daughters????
How do we make them understand that the point we are at is not one that has been lacking in patience to maintain?
When do we know it is okay to jump on someone's desk, to call a commander, a hospital commander, a post commander... anyone who can do SOMETHING to make SOMEONE move to do even the minimum necessary?
When is it worth it to embarrass our children and risk our husband getting a call to tell him to rein in his wife?
When do I stop waiting and being polite, waiting for calls to be returned, asking nicely for yet ANOTHER call to be returned? When do I file complaints and know they are worthy and not me just being a neurotic high strung mom?
And while I am at it, since when did bothering to return a business call become common medical practice? When did it become okay for mental health SPECIALISTS to IGNORE a call for information and at least a direction to head in? When did it become normal for medical persons to lie, to not bother, or to treat a potential client with disrespect and flat out rude behavior for us simply asking a question?
Since when did telling someone their information is listed incorrectly become offensive?
I know I am high strung... I get that. I know I can really make a big emphasis on something only to later understand it was not quite what I thought... I know I tend to be dramatic.... I get that. But does that mean that I have a different standard for raising a fuss? Does that mean I do not get to raise a fuss at all? How is it I don't know when to be that person at the right time for my family?
I may be a neurotic mom. I may be a strong personality to the point of overwhelming others.... but I want to know when it is okay to let myself me just that... strong. And isn't there a time in everyone's lives that they wished their mom had been a little more neurotic about something in their defense or for their care?
I finally had it today. I am tired of leaving yet another message to have yet another far less than professional medical specialist not bother to call me back- even to say No. And since I have hit the WALL on this I know now I am at risk of offending or alienating someone who may actually be useful and helpful on the "new" path I am taking to get what my girl needs.
Still... when is too much???
When do we as mom's cross the line into neurosis over our children and their health?
When am I going too far by starting to push people to DO SOMETHING for God's sake and my daughters????
How do we make them understand that the point we are at is not one that has been lacking in patience to maintain?
When do we know it is okay to jump on someone's desk, to call a commander, a hospital commander, a post commander... anyone who can do SOMETHING to make SOMEONE move to do even the minimum necessary?
When is it worth it to embarrass our children and risk our husband getting a call to tell him to rein in his wife?
When do I stop waiting and being polite, waiting for calls to be returned, asking nicely for yet ANOTHER call to be returned? When do I file complaints and know they are worthy and not me just being a neurotic high strung mom?
And while I am at it, since when did bothering to return a business call become common medical practice? When did it become okay for mental health SPECIALISTS to IGNORE a call for information and at least a direction to head in? When did it become normal for medical persons to lie, to not bother, or to treat a potential client with disrespect and flat out rude behavior for us simply asking a question?
Since when did telling someone their information is listed incorrectly become offensive?
I know I am high strung... I get that. I know I can really make a big emphasis on something only to later understand it was not quite what I thought... I know I tend to be dramatic.... I get that. But does that mean that I have a different standard for raising a fuss? Does that mean I do not get to raise a fuss at all? How is it I don't know when to be that person at the right time for my family?
I may be a neurotic mom. I may be a strong personality to the point of overwhelming others.... but I want to know when it is okay to let myself me just that... strong. And isn't there a time in everyone's lives that they wished their mom had been a little more neurotic about something in their defense or for their care?
I finally had it today. I am tired of leaving yet another message to have yet another far less than professional medical specialist not bother to call me back- even to say No. And since I have hit the WALL on this I know now I am at risk of offending or alienating someone who may actually be useful and helpful on the "new" path I am taking to get what my girl needs.
Still... when is too much???
Friday, December 19, 2008
how stupid can I get? (an adventure story!)
The day was lovely- cold and foggy with the sun peeking through. The river and streams misty with the change in temperature and the ice beginning to form on the water. The leaves were crisp and I was inspired! I ran home yesterday to get the camera and take some pictures of nature... and that is where the trouble began.
I had been told by the school bus driver that Batten Road is a great view of the dam once the leaves are off the trees. So I went. It sure is! Let me say that it runs across the ridge at the top of Croton Gorge with a magnificent view of the "New" (1903) Croton Dam. This Dam is the largest hand hewn built structure on earth outside of the Egyptian Pyramids.
Ok, so you have an idea of how big this dam is right? And if I am on a ridge that is actually slightly higher up then I am pretty high up the gorge no?
So I take a picture. And I decide I want to change out lenses. Hmmm... one would think an intelligent woman would step AWAY from the edge of the gorge. But, no... I do not and as I take off the lens it flips out of my hand and down the gorge. I watch it flip and roll and bounce while saying quietly to myself... No! Stop! No! Crap!!!!!
It did stop- amazing because it really had nothing to stop it. This is not a slope- that would be a kind description. It really is as close to a cliff as you can get without a sheer drop. It is so steep one MUST use hands to help get down and up... I know this because, yes, I did it.
What was I thinking? I don't know... surely not that if I fell I would more than likely die because nothing would stop my roll but the river at the bottom. Surely not that I have 4 children who need a mother. No, I was thinking Lance will kill me if I come home with one fewer lenses. I was thinking, well if I fall, I better have my coat on so I don't get hypothermia while I wait for someone to find me (seriously, I thought this!!! NOW do you get how steep this thing is?)In the same thought though, I took my cell phone OUT of my pocket and put it in the car lest I drop it and lose it. Uh- huh. Smart girl you know!
Mind you I spent my early childhood in the mountains of California and I was not afraid to climb massive boulders and trees and anything else. I have not however, done that as an adult!
This slope was far steeper than the black diamond slopes on the Zugspitze in Germany. With me still? Yeah, well you would have probably NOT have been.
It was something else and apparently after the adrenaline rush that lasted about 40 minutes to climb down and back up, I could NOT stop shaking. Finally I put some protein in me and the shaking eased... but the muscles in every part of my body are killing me today. Oh and so is my vanity. I did this in 4 inch heeled dress boots with no tread. Yup. My hands are torn up, I have a nasty thorn in one from desperately grabbing a scrawny bush as I felt my foot sliding- only to realize the whole bush was a thorn bush.
After, Jason(Tiffy's husband) over the phone said... "Isn't that the one you have two of? You probably could have gotten a replacement on eBay for like $30" All I could say is "shut up Jason, I don't want to know that now!"
The pictures do not do justice. I got to the top and thought to grab the camera out of the car (where I put it for the climb, thus I know my brain was functioning at some level prior to the escapade) and took some pics of the slope to TRY to show you what I did. I will go back today with Lance and let him see if he can do more justice to the site. You know pictures never do justice.
I am home, I am fine. I am sore... and I am realizing I am still a little spontaneous. I thought I had lost that. This is inspiring at this point in my life. I am not a boring mom... I am ...well I don't know... but I am still learning.
For all the pics I took, visit our online albums at Picasa...http://picasaweb.google.com/lancenjulie/LateFall08?authkey=G4VNioWHAM4#
If you have trouble with that we are under picasa web albums and our user name is lancenjulie.
Happy Holidays All!
I had been told by the school bus driver that Batten Road is a great view of the dam once the leaves are off the trees. So I went. It sure is! Let me say that it runs across the ridge at the top of Croton Gorge with a magnificent view of the "New" (1903) Croton Dam. This Dam is the largest hand hewn built structure on earth outside of the Egyptian Pyramids.
Ok, so you have an idea of how big this dam is right? And if I am on a ridge that is actually slightly higher up then I am pretty high up the gorge no?
So I take a picture. And I decide I want to change out lenses. Hmmm... one would think an intelligent woman would step AWAY from the edge of the gorge. But, no... I do not and as I take off the lens it flips out of my hand and down the gorge. I watch it flip and roll and bounce while saying quietly to myself... No! Stop! No! Crap!!!!!
It did stop- amazing because it really had nothing to stop it. This is not a slope- that would be a kind description. It really is as close to a cliff as you can get without a sheer drop. It is so steep one MUST use hands to help get down and up... I know this because, yes, I did it.
What was I thinking? I don't know... surely not that if I fell I would more than likely die because nothing would stop my roll but the river at the bottom. Surely not that I have 4 children who need a mother. No, I was thinking Lance will kill me if I come home with one fewer lenses. I was thinking, well if I fall, I better have my coat on so I don't get hypothermia while I wait for someone to find me (seriously, I thought this!!! NOW do you get how steep this thing is?)In the same thought though, I took my cell phone OUT of my pocket and put it in the car lest I drop it and lose it. Uh- huh. Smart girl you know!
Mind you I spent my early childhood in the mountains of California and I was not afraid to climb massive boulders and trees and anything else. I have not however, done that as an adult!
This slope was far steeper than the black diamond slopes on the Zugspitze in Germany. With me still? Yeah, well you would have probably NOT have been.
It was something else and apparently after the adrenaline rush that lasted about 40 minutes to climb down and back up, I could NOT stop shaking. Finally I put some protein in me and the shaking eased... but the muscles in every part of my body are killing me today. Oh and so is my vanity. I did this in 4 inch heeled dress boots with no tread. Yup. My hands are torn up, I have a nasty thorn in one from desperately grabbing a scrawny bush as I felt my foot sliding- only to realize the whole bush was a thorn bush.
After, Jason(Tiffy's husband) over the phone said... "Isn't that the one you have two of? You probably could have gotten a replacement on eBay for like $30" All I could say is "shut up Jason, I don't want to know that now!"
The pictures do not do justice. I got to the top and thought to grab the camera out of the car (where I put it for the climb, thus I know my brain was functioning at some level prior to the escapade) and took some pics of the slope to TRY to show you what I did. I will go back today with Lance and let him see if he can do more justice to the site. You know pictures never do justice.
I am home, I am fine. I am sore... and I am realizing I am still a little spontaneous. I thought I had lost that. This is inspiring at this point in my life. I am not a boring mom... I am ...well I don't know... but I am still learning.
For all the pics I took, visit our online albums at Picasa...http://picasaweb.google.com/lancenjulie/LateFall08?authkey=G4VNioWHAM4#
If you have trouble with that we are under picasa web albums and our user name is lancenjulie.
Happy Holidays All!
Saturday, November 1, 2008
should old aquaintance be forgot?
As time went on I thought that I did not need any old connections. I thought that while I remembered so many, they must have forgotten me. I thought that even if they did remember me, they had their lives now and who needed someone from the past?
I thought I would be okay with not knowing who got married and what their beautiful children would look like. I didn't think the guys that made all us girls so giddy would make comments about how beautiful it is to have children and be dad's. I didn't know it would matter to me that I would be so proud of my friends from days gone by who have achieved great things.
I didn't think I would tear up at the thought of the joy that can be found when connecting with the past but living in today.
Grateful, I sit here and close out my day, thinking that finding our roots in our past is a good thing, a blessing. Tonight as I go to bed I am just a little more secure in my world, a little more connected to this place we call earth and a lot more happy that I have found a lost part of my past and realized it is still relevant to making today a great day and tomorrow a wonderful possibility.
I thought I would be okay with not knowing who got married and what their beautiful children would look like. I didn't think the guys that made all us girls so giddy would make comments about how beautiful it is to have children and be dad's. I didn't know it would matter to me that I would be so proud of my friends from days gone by who have achieved great things.
I didn't think I would tear up at the thought of the joy that can be found when connecting with the past but living in today.
Grateful, I sit here and close out my day, thinking that finding our roots in our past is a good thing, a blessing. Tonight as I go to bed I am just a little more secure in my world, a little more connected to this place we call earth and a lot more happy that I have found a lost part of my past and realized it is still relevant to making today a great day and tomorrow a wonderful possibility.
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
When Sleep Comes Not
When sleep comes not... I rest upon my chair...fingers on the go, ready to release the pent up thoughts... to find the peace that comes when I am empty of word and thought once again.
When sleep comes not...I have seen one of them die...and I awake with knotted throat in fear of what is not real...and praying they are sleeping sweetly yet.
When sleep comes not...all that is plain to see in daylight hours...becomes a monster of its own...feelings are not exempt and I pray that I won't drown in them as I empty my heart into this technological void.
When sleep comes not...my tea bags are abused and my cup will finally be sitting as empty as I feel... and finally know that I am ready to try again.
When sleep comes not...600 count sheets mean not a thing...naked skin, soft fabric, pillows from heaven, do not bring what I want most... to simply sleep.
When sleep comes not...I have seen one of them die...and I awake with knotted throat in fear of what is not real...and praying they are sleeping sweetly yet.
When sleep comes not...all that is plain to see in daylight hours...becomes a monster of its own...feelings are not exempt and I pray that I won't drown in them as I empty my heart into this technological void.
When sleep comes not...my tea bags are abused and my cup will finally be sitting as empty as I feel... and finally know that I am ready to try again.
When sleep comes not...600 count sheets mean not a thing...naked skin, soft fabric, pillows from heaven, do not bring what I want most... to simply sleep.
people dying stinks.
No matter how hard we try to prepare ourselves for it, no matter if we try to separate ourselves from someone to avoid the pain, no matter how much warning or how little- death stinks.
Phone calls in the middle of the night pretty much only mean one thing- unless it is from someone who is a known drinker, in which case they are generally a "hey how are you doing? Oh were you sleeping?"
Those are preferred to the ones with hushed tones that apologize for waking you. The ones where your heart skips a beat if you turned on the light and can see the caller id and know it is not frivolous.
About midnight last night the call came for me. My mom on the line, quiet and calm (in shock) to say my grandma Shirk had died within the last hour, unexpected, no reason apparent, just gone. Grandpa is in desperate grief. She was his everything. He speaks of killing himself so that he can just get his misery over with. He cannot see a life without her. My step dad is going to face two funerals in a matter of months I am sure.
Then you drive your husband to the train station and keeping it together pretty well until on the way back, alone on the curvy roads in the early morning dark, Mark Shultz sings "Walking Her Home" and the tears start to fall. Might as well be trying to drive in a hurricane for the visibility. Why did I pick this morning to listen to my new WOW cd? I had no idea that song was on there. Great way to find out, no?
Then comes the telling the children. Do you do it before school and ruin their day? After and ruin their evening, leaving them without the solace of finding laughter and peace with their friends? Forgetfulness in school work?
For yourself once they are all gone and you are home alone facing a long day-how do you keep the heartburn away? How do you get rid of the stupid awkward lump in your throat that makes you feel you cannot take a deep breath?
And why of all days do you choose to wear eyeliner on this day?
Phone calls in the middle of the night pretty much only mean one thing- unless it is from someone who is a known drinker, in which case they are generally a "hey how are you doing? Oh were you sleeping?"
Those are preferred to the ones with hushed tones that apologize for waking you. The ones where your heart skips a beat if you turned on the light and can see the caller id and know it is not frivolous.
About midnight last night the call came for me. My mom on the line, quiet and calm (in shock) to say my grandma Shirk had died within the last hour, unexpected, no reason apparent, just gone. Grandpa is in desperate grief. She was his everything. He speaks of killing himself so that he can just get his misery over with. He cannot see a life without her. My step dad is going to face two funerals in a matter of months I am sure.
Then you drive your husband to the train station and keeping it together pretty well until on the way back, alone on the curvy roads in the early morning dark, Mark Shultz sings "Walking Her Home" and the tears start to fall. Might as well be trying to drive in a hurricane for the visibility. Why did I pick this morning to listen to my new WOW cd? I had no idea that song was on there. Great way to find out, no?
Then comes the telling the children. Do you do it before school and ruin their day? After and ruin their evening, leaving them without the solace of finding laughter and peace with their friends? Forgetfulness in school work?
For yourself once they are all gone and you are home alone facing a long day-how do you keep the heartburn away? How do you get rid of the stupid awkward lump in your throat that makes you feel you cannot take a deep breath?
And why of all days do you choose to wear eyeliner on this day?
Friday, August 1, 2008
what happened between Fulda and 2008
Spring of 1990
So here I am dating this awesome guy, Lance. My parents are gone to the states to Walter Reed for treatment for my mom that she cannot get in Germany. They call to say "we are being reassigned. Compassionate Reassignment." I am devastated. So 6 weeks before the end of my junior year I move to a place where my graduating class is close to 1000 people. That is over twice the size of Fulda High- which included 7th to 12th grades! Talk about shock. I get there and spend most days crying. I miss my friends, my Lance, my home. I stick out like a sore thumb. No one dresses like we did in Fulda. No one talks like we did. I do not know any of the most up to date music. I do not know any up to date tv shows or movies either. I am LOST!
I break up with Lance due to pressure around me. I miss him like crazy and he does not even fight for me. Not even a tiny request to not do this to us. This just tears me apart even more. I start to date this real jerk... Jason. He tries to make me into someone/thing that I am not. His little trophy.
I also get my first pap smear done. It comes back bad. Real Bad. I am told they don't know if I have cancer or not. I have to go to Walter Reed and get more tests. Lots more. I spend at least 2 days a month up there. The tests keep coming back inconclusive.
I make a few friends in Newport News at Denbigh High where I am now. I get a job. I try to build a new life. But I am miserable. My parents have'nt tried to get us involved in church. I miss my youth group and my faith is slipping. I am still LOST.
Eventually I graduate and choose to take a semester off of school. I go to college in January and also meet this new guy. Jason and I had broken up in June (? maybe july?) And I am shopping for some milk for my mom so she can take some pain meds and it is late. He comes up to me and asks if I know where the wine coolers are (how lame is that line? It is a grocery store!) I tell him no, i am not old enough to drink. He ends up in line behind me in the store and asks me to join him at a party a few streets away. Since this is my neighborhood I figure, ok. He has been casually talking and we have things in common. Besides, he is hot and I am bored.
For what happens with Lance and I during all of this see my other blogs on how we met and got married. I am skipping on.
Lance and I get married and he is in college. He got out of the Army to go to school and now realizes it is not for him. Not to mention that I thought I was pregnant and we had no health care or money to even get our own place. An Army recruiter comes into my work (coffee shop) and we chat. I tell him how I miss seeing that uniform. He and Lance meet one day and Lance decides it is time to go back in. At least he can take care of a family that way. The requirement is that we get to go back to Germany. They get it done. In January he left... in April I followed.
We live in a cute little apartment and meet our neighbors above us are Tracy and Don. Below us are John and Linda. Below them are Jeremy and Tamara. All of us are newlyweds and childless.. so far. Then we start getting pregnant. And the Army moves us all into Vogelweh housing in Kaiserslautern. We still spend time together. Lots. They become our family. We all had babies together. Some of us had another one quickly. Others lost another one. It was tough. We all experienced that second year of marriage together.
We all ended up moving at our 4 years. Tamara and Jeramy and us move to Colorado Springs, Fort Carson. There our friendship fell apart shortly before our move 4 years later. Linda and John divorced and so did Don and Tracy. Now only 2 of the 4 are still married. While I no longer keep in touch with Tamara, Linda does. All of us have lost touch with Tracy.
Friends of ours in Germany that we went to church with, George and Pam have also moved to Colorado. We enjoy time with them. We have the twins (we said, let's have one more and ha! God LAUGHED and gave us two!) They become Nicholas's godparents. Eventually Lance gets out again... this time to go reserves. He thinks, this time he will work for the Post Office. We move home to MI and things get bad. There are no jobs to be found. He finally gets put on as temp at he PO but then they tell him his job is going away. My parents offer to move us to FL to stay with them while he finds a job. So we move again. And again, and again and again. Yes. 4 homes in FL! He is back in school though and almost done with his AA.
He gets sent to school in South Carolina to reclass and while there 9-11 happens. Shortly after, he is activated for the war. We move to Savannah because the unit is asking for volunteers for a 2nd year and he accepts. They end up not doing this later, but I refused to be apart from him for that long so we followed him from FL to Savannah (Hunter Army Air Field). After his year is up he decides he actually misses the Army. He tries the active component of the Reserves. (AGR or Active Guard Reserve) and makes it. His first offer is New Jersey. We take it. After 8 months there he is promoted and we are told we can move. He takes that offer much to my dismay. But he can now be back in his specialty (JAG) so off we go to Wisconsin.
We have been here for 2 years now and are expecting orders soon (long story as to why). This will be our last official move as far as we know. He can retire in a little over 4 years. We love Wisconsin. It is a good place to raise a family. We are hoping for either L.A. (to be near my dad) or Columbia SC (to be near the seminary we will attend when he retires). No matter where we go though, I know God has a purpose in it. In each move I have had heartache. In each move I have seen God moving in our lives. I have seen the greater purpose. We have grown and experienced amazing things. It has been difficult but a total gift.
So here I am dating this awesome guy, Lance. My parents are gone to the states to Walter Reed for treatment for my mom that she cannot get in Germany. They call to say "we are being reassigned. Compassionate Reassignment." I am devastated. So 6 weeks before the end of my junior year I move to a place where my graduating class is close to 1000 people. That is over twice the size of Fulda High- which included 7th to 12th grades! Talk about shock. I get there and spend most days crying. I miss my friends, my Lance, my home. I stick out like a sore thumb. No one dresses like we did in Fulda. No one talks like we did. I do not know any of the most up to date music. I do not know any up to date tv shows or movies either. I am LOST!
I break up with Lance due to pressure around me. I miss him like crazy and he does not even fight for me. Not even a tiny request to not do this to us. This just tears me apart even more. I start to date this real jerk... Jason. He tries to make me into someone/thing that I am not. His little trophy.
I also get my first pap smear done. It comes back bad. Real Bad. I am told they don't know if I have cancer or not. I have to go to Walter Reed and get more tests. Lots more. I spend at least 2 days a month up there. The tests keep coming back inconclusive.
I make a few friends in Newport News at Denbigh High where I am now. I get a job. I try to build a new life. But I am miserable. My parents have'nt tried to get us involved in church. I miss my youth group and my faith is slipping. I am still LOST.
Eventually I graduate and choose to take a semester off of school. I go to college in January and also meet this new guy. Jason and I had broken up in June (? maybe july?) And I am shopping for some milk for my mom so she can take some pain meds and it is late. He comes up to me and asks if I know where the wine coolers are (how lame is that line? It is a grocery store!) I tell him no, i am not old enough to drink. He ends up in line behind me in the store and asks me to join him at a party a few streets away. Since this is my neighborhood I figure, ok. He has been casually talking and we have things in common. Besides, he is hot and I am bored.
For what happens with Lance and I during all of this see my other blogs on how we met and got married. I am skipping on.
Lance and I get married and he is in college. He got out of the Army to go to school and now realizes it is not for him. Not to mention that I thought I was pregnant and we had no health care or money to even get our own place. An Army recruiter comes into my work (coffee shop) and we chat. I tell him how I miss seeing that uniform. He and Lance meet one day and Lance decides it is time to go back in. At least he can take care of a family that way. The requirement is that we get to go back to Germany. They get it done. In January he left... in April I followed.
We live in a cute little apartment and meet our neighbors above us are Tracy and Don. Below us are John and Linda. Below them are Jeremy and Tamara. All of us are newlyweds and childless.. so far. Then we start getting pregnant. And the Army moves us all into Vogelweh housing in Kaiserslautern. We still spend time together. Lots. They become our family. We all had babies together. Some of us had another one quickly. Others lost another one. It was tough. We all experienced that second year of marriage together.
We all ended up moving at our 4 years. Tamara and Jeramy and us move to Colorado Springs, Fort Carson. There our friendship fell apart shortly before our move 4 years later. Linda and John divorced and so did Don and Tracy. Now only 2 of the 4 are still married. While I no longer keep in touch with Tamara, Linda does. All of us have lost touch with Tracy.
Friends of ours in Germany that we went to church with, George and Pam have also moved to Colorado. We enjoy time with them. We have the twins (we said, let's have one more and ha! God LAUGHED and gave us two!) They become Nicholas's godparents. Eventually Lance gets out again... this time to go reserves. He thinks, this time he will work for the Post Office. We move home to MI and things get bad. There are no jobs to be found. He finally gets put on as temp at he PO but then they tell him his job is going away. My parents offer to move us to FL to stay with them while he finds a job. So we move again. And again, and again and again. Yes. 4 homes in FL! He is back in school though and almost done with his AA.
He gets sent to school in South Carolina to reclass and while there 9-11 happens. Shortly after, he is activated for the war. We move to Savannah because the unit is asking for volunteers for a 2nd year and he accepts. They end up not doing this later, but I refused to be apart from him for that long so we followed him from FL to Savannah (Hunter Army Air Field). After his year is up he decides he actually misses the Army. He tries the active component of the Reserves. (AGR or Active Guard Reserve) and makes it. His first offer is New Jersey. We take it. After 8 months there he is promoted and we are told we can move. He takes that offer much to my dismay. But he can now be back in his specialty (JAG) so off we go to Wisconsin.
We have been here for 2 years now and are expecting orders soon (long story as to why). This will be our last official move as far as we know. He can retire in a little over 4 years. We love Wisconsin. It is a good place to raise a family. We are hoping for either L.A. (to be near my dad) or Columbia SC (to be near the seminary we will attend when he retires). No matter where we go though, I know God has a purpose in it. In each move I have had heartache. In each move I have seen God moving in our lives. I have seen the greater purpose. We have grown and experienced amazing things. It has been difficult but a total gift.
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